Empathy begins the process of connecting us with others, as we share their emotions. Our own life experience enables us to understand something of the life experience of others. That emotional understanding is the distinction we call empathy: “. . . the capacity to share the feelings of others . . .” “Empathy is a complex capability enabling individuals to…
Read More
Value for Saturday of Week 46 in the season of Assessing
Negotiations and Other Interactions
All relationships involve negotiations.
- Everything is a negotiation. Everything is a little bit of give and take. [attributed to Lamman Rucker]
- Successful negotiation is not about getting to “yes”; it’s about mastering ‘no’ and understanding what the path to an agreement is. [attributed to Christopher Voss]
- Any negotiation involves compromise and no one will get everything they want. [attributed to Nicky Morgan]
The title of this topic comes from Paul Simon’s song “Train in the Distance“, wherein Simon writes “negotiations and love songs are often mistaken for one and the same.” The idealized version of marriage is continual bliss but the truth, in a relationship between sincere parties, is an ongoing series of negotiations and a search for harmony. Negotiation is part of every relationship.
Each of the quotations atop this page applies equally to everyday affairs – personal life – as to business. Methods will differ but a fundamental underlying dynamic is the same.
The best human interactions are based on equality and mutual respect. In a relationship of people of unequal power, the more powerful party must accord the less powerful party equality if the interaction is to be ethical. In other words, our commitment is first, not to take advantage of others and second, to support each other and together create a better life than any of the parties could have alone.
Real
True Narratives
- Jeffrey Krivis, Improvisational Negotiation: A Mediator's Stories of Conflict About Love, Money, Anger - and the Strategies That Resolved Them (Jossey-Bass, 2006).
- Fredrik Stanton, Great Negotiations: Agreements That Changed the Modern World (Westholme Publishing, 2010).
Technical and Analytical Readings
Most studies of negotiations emphasize ways to achieve or leverage power and obtain more power.
- Roger Dawson, Secrets of Power Negotiating (Career Press, 2010).
- Roy Lewicki, Bruce Barry and David Sanders, Negotiation (McGraw-Hill/Irwin, 2009).
- I. William Zartman and Guy Olivier Faure, eds., Escalation and Negotiation in International Conflicts (Cambridge University Press, 2006).
- I. William Zartman, Negotiation and Conflict Management: Essays on Theory and Practice (Routledge, 2008).
Others describe methods for mutually satisfying negotiations in business and diplomacy.
- Carrie Menkel-Meadow, Andrea K. Schneider and Lela P. Love, Negotiation: Procedures for Problem Solving (Aspen Publishers, 2006).
- Andrea Kupfer Schneider and Christopher Honeyman, The Negotiator's Fieldbook: The Desk Reference for the Experienced Negotiator (American Bar Association, 2006).
- Francisco Aguilar and Mauro Galluccio, Psychological and Political Strategies for Peace Negotiations: A Cognitive Approach (Springer, 2010).
- Raymond Cohen, Negotiating Across Cultures: International Communication In an Interdependent World (United States Institute of Peace, 1997).
- The Journal of Conflict Resolution
Some people are experts in mediating other people's conflicts.
- Joseph P. Stulberg and Lela P. Love, The Middle Voice: Mediating Conflict Successfully (Carolina Academic Press, 2008).
- Carrie J. Menkel-Meadow, Lela Porter Love and Andrea Kupfer Schneider, Mediation: Practice, Policy, and Ethics (Aspen Publishers, 2006).
- Carrie J. Menkel-Meadow, Lela Porter Love, Andrea Kupfer Schneider and Jean R. Sternlight, Dispute Resolution: Beyond the Adversarial Model (Aspen Publishers, 2004).
Consider the negotiations in which people look beyond power to more mutually satisfying and sustainable solutions.
- Betty Carter and Joan K. Peters, Love, Honor & Negotiate: Building Partnerships That Last a Lifetime (Pocket Books, 1996).
- Harriet Lerner, The Dance of Connection: How to Talk to Someone When You're Mad, Hurt, Scared, Frustrated, Insulted, Betrayed, or Desperate (HarperCollins, 2001).
Photographs
Documentary and Educational Films
Imaginary
Fictional Narratives
Poetry
Music: Composers, artists, and major works
The lyrics to Paul Simon’s song, “Train in the Distance”, include the observation: “Negotiations and love songs / Are often mistaken for one and the same”. Or, as they say, can’t live with ‘em, can’t live without ‘em.
With its close interplay between two disparate voices, the violin-piano sonata form naturally conveys a sense of intimacy and interchange. Of necessity, the two voices engage in a back-and-forth musical dialogue, each player in turn taking and ceding the foreground. While this occurs in other chamber forms as well, it is most easily heard here.
Ludwig van Beethoven’s sonatas for violin and piano (list of recorded performances):
- No. 1 in D Major, Op. 12, No. 1 (1798) (approx. 19-25’) (list of recorded performances)
- No. 2 in A Major, Op. 12, No. 2 (1798) (approx. 16-20’) (list of recorded performances)
- No. 3 in E-flat Major, Op. 12, No. 3 (1798) (approx. 17-22’) (list of recorded performances)
- No. 4 in A Minor, Op. 23 (1801) (approx. 18-26’) (list of recorded performances)
- No. 5 in F Major, Op. 24 (“Spring”) (1801) (approx. 25-28’) (list of recorded performances)
- No. 6 in A Major, Op. 30, No. 1 (1802) (approx. 21-23’) (list of recorded performances)
- No. 7 in C Minor, Op. 30, No. 2, “Eroica” (1802) (approx. 25-29’) (list of recorded performances)
- No. 8 in G Major, Op. 30, No. 3 (1802) (approx. 20-21’) (list of recorded performances)
- No. 9 in A Major, Op. 47, “Kreutzer” (1803) (approx. 34-46’) (list of recorded performances)
- No. 10 in G Major, Op. 96 (1812) (approx. 28-31’) (list of recorded performances)
Robert Schumann’s three violin sonatas:
- Sonata No. 1 in A minor, Op. 105 (1851) (approx. 17-24’) (list of recorded performances)
- Sonata No. 2 in D minor, Op. 121 (1851) (approx. 27-33’) (list of recorded performances)
- Sonata No. 3 in A minor, WoO 27 (1853) (approx. 21-22’) (list of recorded performances)
Other violin sonatas:
- Francis Poulenc, Violin Sonata, FP 119 (1943) (approx. 18-20’) (list of recorded performances)
- Maurice Ravel, Violin Sonata No. 1 in A Minor, M 12 (1897) (approx. 15-21’)
- Camille Saint-Saëns, Violin Sonatas: No. 1 in D minor, Op. 75, R. 123 (1885) (approx. 22-24’) (list of recorded performances); and No. 2 in E-flat Major, Op. 102, R. 130 (1896) (approx. 23-24’) (list of recorded performances)
- Zygmunt Stojowski, Violin Sonatas: No. 1 in G Major, Op. 13 (1893) (approx. 22-29’); and No. 2 in E minor, Op. 37 (1911) (approx. 27’)
- Heitor Villa-Lobos, Violin Sonata No. 3, W 171 (1920) (approx. 21-22’) (list of recorded performances)
- Amy Beach, Sonata for Violin and Piano in A minor, Op. 34 (1896) (approx. 30-34’) (list of recorded performances)
Many chamber works by Bohuslav Martinů display a character of interaction that evokes this subject of human interaction as negotiation:
- 5 Madrigal Stanzas for Violin & Piano, H 297 (1943) (approx. 11’) (list of recorded performances)
- 5 Short Pieces for Violin and Piano, H 184 (1930) (approx. 11’)
- 7 Arabesques, H 201 (1931) (arr. for violin & piano) (approx. 15’)
- Concerto for Violin & Piano, H 13 (1910) (approx. 27’)
- Czech Rhapsody for Violin and Piano, H 307 (1945) (approx. 10’) (list of recorded performances)
- Elegy for Violin and Piano (1909) (approx. 11’)
- Impromptu for Violin and Piano, H 166 (1927) (approx. 11’)
- Intermezzo, H 261 (1937) (approx. 10’)
- Sonatina in G Major, H 262 (1937) (approx. 10’)
- Duo for Violin and Cello No. 1, H 157 (1927) (approx. 13’) (list of recorded performances)
- Duo for Violin and Cello No. 2, H 371 (1958) (approx. 10’) (list of recorded performances)
- Violin Sonata No. 1, H 182 (1929) (approx. 20’) (list of recorded performances)
- Violin Sonata No. 2, H 208 (1931) (approx. 13’)
- Violin Sonata No. 3, H 303 (1944) (approx. 26-27’) (list of recorded performances)
- Violin Sonata in C Major, H 120 (1919) (approx. 32’) (list of recorded performances)
Mauricio Kagel’s piano trios are dark, often brooding works, evoking troubled interactions between and among the players.
- Piano Trio No. 1 (1985) (approx. 17’)
- Piano Trio No. 2 (2001) (approx. 19’)
- Piano Trio No. 3 (2006) (approx. 28’)
Other compositions:
- Witold Lutosławski, Symphony No. 1 (1947) (approx. 25’) (list of recorded performances): “Ebullient energy characterises all rapid fragments and the intricate metro-rhythmic changes highlight the impetus of the music. The source of these outstanding rhythmic effects which intensify the spontaneity are either added or subtracted rhythmic values and irregular accents.”
- Raga Pahadi Jhinjoti (Pahari Jhinjoti) a Hindustani classical raag. Performances are by Ali Akbar Khan, Nikhil Banerjee and Buddhaditya Mukherjee.
- Arthur Bliss, Conversations for Wind & Strings, F. 16 (1920) (approx. 16’) (list of recorded performances)
- Similarly, though it is written for a single instrument, Ludwig van Beethoven’s Piano Sonata No. 10 in G major, Op. 14, No. 2 (1799) (approx. 15-17’) (list of recorded performances), suggests an interaction between two lovers.
- Gustav Holst, Double Concerto for two violins & small orchestra, Op. 49 (1930) (approx. 15’) (list of recorded performances)
- Heinrich von Herzogenberg, three string quartets: String Quartet No. 1 in G minor, Op. 42, No. 1 (1884) (approx. 33-37’); String Quartet No. 2 in D minor, Op. 42, No. 2 (1884) (approx. 36’); String Quartet No. 3 in G Major, Op. 42, No. 3 (1884) (approx. 24’)
- York Bowen, Piano Trio in E Minor, Op. 118 (1945) (approx. 24’); Phantasy Quintet, Op. 93 (1932) (approx. 13-15’) (list of recorded performances)
- Louis Théodore Gouvy, String Quartet No. 5 in C Minor, Op. 68 (1874) (approx. 32’)
- Henryk Górecki, Old Polish Music (Muzyka Staropolska), Op. 24 (1969) (approx. 24-27’): trumpets and strings, with widely divergent perspectives
- Aleksandr Glazunov, String Quartet No. 2 in F Major, Op. 10 (1884) (approx. 30’)
- Glazunov, String Quartet No. 4 in A Minor, Op. 64 (1894) (approx. 33-34’)
- Wilhelm Furtwängler, Violin Sonata No. 1 in D minor (1935) (approx. 56’) (list of recorded performances): “A very fine large-scale violin sonata in constant song and imaginative soulful turmoil.”
- Furtwängler, Violin Sonata No. 2 in D Major (1938) (approx. 43-46’): “The Second Sonata bursts with symphonic intent. It is a passionate work deep in the romantic melos and turbulent in the two outer movements (there are three in total).”
- Fred Lehrdahl, Give and Take (2014) (approx. 15’): “The title . . . evokes the responsive and varied interaction of the violin and cello throughout the piece. They are in an intense conversation, sometimes echoing and elaborating one another, other times each going its own way in its own tempo, still other times one breaking off with a change in direction that is soon followed by the other.” [the composer]
Albums:
- Alvin Ayler, “Live on the Riviera” (2005) (57’)
- Derek Bailey & Evan Parker, “Arch Duo” (1999) (70’) “is a rather lengthy continuous improvisation from two of the most well-known and skilled British free improvisers. It's always interesting to hear Evan Parker before he began to perform circular breathing techniques as his primary mode.”
- Arthur Gottschalk, “Art for Two” (2018) (52’)
Music: songs and other short pieces
- Paul Simon, “Train in the Distance” (lyrics)
- Kenny Rogers & Dolly Parton, “Islands in the Stream” (lyrics)
- Avil Lavigne, “Complicated” (lyrics)
- Whitney Houston, “It’s Not Right But It’s Okay” (lyrics)
- Dream, “He Loves U Not” (lyrics)
Visual Arts
- Konstantin Makovsky, Difficult Negotiations (1883)
